I am so alone, and I find myself wanting you here more than anyone else. It still amazes me because we are no where near as close as we used to be. I miss you. I had a dream about you last night. Even though I was mad at you for a bit, you managed to make everything better. I miss that. I want you to come see everything here, I just want to spend time with you. I hate feeling like this and thinking about things.
I really want something to work out, it's unfair. I don't understand anything anymore if it doesn't. I don't want to wait. I'm impatient. I feel like I deserve this.
As for most people, I think I've pushed a lot of people away because I get annoyed way too fast. I can't do anything with out letting little things get to me. At the same time I feel like people walk all over me, and I just don't want to be around them anymore. by the way, if you talk to someone I've hooked up with as more than friends, I probably won't want to be your friend anymore. s'all I'm tryna say. I think it's shady, why would you want my sloppy seconds?
I'm tired of you telling me what you think I need to do. You're not a good friend of mine, you're not my family and you don't know much about me. And you don't need to talk shit on my family. I'm pretty much over you and I try to ignore you as much as possible anymore. You're ridiculous. I don't want to hang out with your sisters friends, I don't want to be put on blind dates. I do what I want. Get the fuck out of my personal life. I don't mind being social, but I don't want your opinion/advice. If I did, I would ask you.
I can't save for shit. I need to get out of this house. I really need to work on this.
I need to stop sitting at home so much. I think too much.
PS, Your tits can't always be hanging out if you don't have any, sorry.
And trust me, I'm not jealous of you, and/or your boyfriend. Or the fact that you look like more of a man than he does. Just sayin'.
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